need another drink. this is the easiest way
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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