Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Randomize
