so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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