Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
