just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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