how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
