Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
