Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
