shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE