At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I haven't been this sober since birth.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Less talking, more tequila
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
