Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
My liver just broke up with me...
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
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