so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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