I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
