wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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