well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
