you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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