just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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