Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize