I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
