i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?