do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize