I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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