All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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