I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
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We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
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lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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