Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
im on a boat
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