it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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