i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
All I want is dick and wine.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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