working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
