marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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