what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
