its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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