just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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