So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Randomize
