why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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