my room smells like sperm. sweet.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
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He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
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I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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