Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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