I must be too annoying 4 u.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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