Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
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