I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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