Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
