He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
