My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
don't judge my taste in strippers
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