I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
false alarm. still invincible.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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