After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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