Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
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i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
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i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.