Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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