Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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