After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
