but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
