i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
